A place to say what’s actually going on
Most guys I see didn’t grow up with anywhere to put this stuff. You’re not supposed to complain — you’re supposed to handle it. Provide, show up, keep it together. So you do, for years, until one day you’re snapping at your kids over nothing, or you and your wife are living like roommates, or you’re lying awake doing math on money and marriage and whether you’re actually doing okay at any of it.
I work with a lot of husbands and dads — guys with careers, mortgages, kids’ schedules to run, and about zero bandwidth left to figure out why they feel like they’re failing at all of it anyway. If that’s you, I’d like to help.
Why come see a guy about this
I’m a pretty normal guy — married, raising a teenager. I’m not going to sit across from you nodding silently while you talk into the void. I ask real questions, I push back when something doesn’t add up, and I’ll tell you what I actually think. Some of that comes from my own life — I went through a serious accident and years of PTSD I didn’t recognize at the time, and it took a therapist who was willing to actually engage with me (not just stare and nod) before any of it helped.
That’s the version of therapy I do now. Less couch, more conversation.
What guys are usually dealing with when they call me
Marriage and family strain. You love your wife and your kids, and you’re also exhausted, resentful, checked out, or all three at once. We work on what’s actually causing the distance — communication that’s broken down, old resentment, or just two people who stopped being a team somewhere in the last few years of raising kids.
Carrying the “provider” weight alone. Work stress, money stress, the sense that your worth is tied to how well you’re performing at your job and at home. I’m not going to tell you to “just relax” — we’ll actually look at what’s driving the pressure and what you can change versus what you’re going to have to make peace with.
Anger that comes out sideways. A lot of guys don’t think of themselves as “an angry person” — they just notice they’re snapping at their kids, or their wife says they’ve gotten harder to be around. Usually it’s not really about anger. It’s about everything else finally leaking out somewhere.
Old stuff you’ve never actually dealt with. Trauma, a rough childhood, things you’ve been managing on your own for a decade or two because that’s what you learned to do. You don’t have to have language for it yet. That’s what the sessions are for.
Just not having anyone to talk to. Not every guy who calls me is in crisis. Some of you are doing fine, honestly — you just don’t have a place to think out loud that isn’t your wife, because that’s not fair to put on her either.
How sessions actually work
I see clients in my office on Alhambra Blvd, or if you’re anywhere else in California, we can meet remotely — same me, same approach, just on a screen. And if sitting across from a therapist sounds like the last thing you want to do, I also offer Walk-and-Talk sessions — we meet outside and talk while we walk instead of sitting in an office. A lot of guys find it easier to actually say things when they’re moving instead of staring at my face.
Reach out
You don’t need to have this figured out before you call. Text or call me at (916) 919-0218, or reach out through the contact page, and we’ll set up a first session. That’s usually all it takes to start.
