A while ago, I saw my train in the distance, and I knew it was about three minutes away. I was about 90 seconds out, so I knew I was golden. I stopped sprinting and slowed to a fast walk. Then, I came upon a dude, probably homeless, sitting, sobbing and banging his head as hard as possible against a metal pole.
Keeping my eye on the train, I stopped and said, “You need to stop banging your head.” He looked up at me, surprised, and stopped. As I rushed to the train, I stopped, turned around and gave him a couple bucks. He looked at me and said, “Thanks for telling me to stop.” I said, “No problem,” and turned around and sprinted to the train. I was just in time…
Let’s be honest for a second. He may have started banging his head again in two minutes. He also could have taken the money and bought a 40. But cynicism aside, I felt like maybe I made a little difference in his day. And that’s my point and encouragement. We never know what people are going through, and we can’t imagine how a little act might have a tremendously positive impact on their day. Maybe it’s a smile and sincere hello to the security guard at your building. Maybe it’s saying something kind and understanding while holding the door open for the dad struggling with three kids at the movies. Maybe it’s giving your shopping cart to a woman at the door at the grocery store, so she didn’t have to walk to the cart return. These little, kind things might take us 5 seconds and are simple, but maybe they’ll make a little difference in a person’s day. We’ll probably never know.
Let’s call them “random acts of kindness.” Coincidentally, February 17 is “Random Acts of Kindness Day.” Here’s your opportunity.
As I’m writing, I thought of a poem that “J” a 16-year-old client of mine wrote. (He gave me full permission to share.) It reminds me of the pain people feel and nobody knows.
Fear He Who Hides Behind One
To understand one must peel off the mask
One can be decaying in the mind, while flourishing in the eyes of others
One can muddy the water with success, to hide behind wealth
Like a sadistic American Psycho, or a simple Taxi Driver who is invisible to others
Our minds, as fragile as they are, are powerful
Many plagued by the inner working of thoughts, experience and emotion
Our skeletons in our closet that are hidden with a mere smile
Ruminating in the mind, repeating the rancid memories, too many to describe
Nobody knows what is happening inside
Except the mind itself
Sticks and stones may break our bones
But our minds
Our mind will shatter by itself when we are alone.
N is a deep kid, and I’m sure I’m missing some of his points. But at a simplistic level, he reminds us that a person’s smile says nothing about how they feel inside. A little kind act may make a big difference in someone’s day.
Until next time…