For those of you who read my last piece, you know that I’m epileptic. When I was 17, my best friend and I shared a six-pack and got in his car. Since my car was a hand-me-down, orange station wagon, license place 6 BETSY, we drove his brand new, zippy Accord. We got in an accident, and I was in a coma for three days. I saw the car later that spring. It was completely totaled. I learned later that a firefighter had nightmares from seeing our accident. We should have been killed.
Epilepsy is a small price to pay. But it’s no joke. Although the voices are usually quiet, there is a small voice whispering and reminding me that I could have a seizure. I could die from a seizure.
The DMV is not a big fan of epileptics driving. And my new neurologist is REALLY not a big fan of me driving. He is, “very concerned” about me driving. Last weekend, I had a remote EEG, which entailed having about 25 electrodes glued and taped to my head. If I had any seizure activity, I’d lose my license. If not, I’d get to keep it. It was 50-50.
Over the weekend, I relaxed like I haven’t in years. I napped twice a day and sat on the couch the rest of the time. My family waited on me. I did none of my weekend chores. It obviously isn’t the norm, but my family knows how important it is for me to have a license. It was glorious.
Yesterday, I learned I had no seizures. Although they didn’t outright say it, they didn’t say I couldn’t drive. Although I wanted to have a dance party to celebrate, I simply headed into my next session.
And the anxiety has lifted. For the most part. I’m still worried. My doctor still isn’t thrilled with me not driving. He’ll likely continue to threaten to take away my license. And I’ll likely continue to push back. Because, like I said, my family depends on me driving.
And with this in-mind, I’ve reflected on what lifestyle changes/adjustments I can make to help take care of myself. Obviously, I can’t lie on the couch all weekend. But there are things I can do to reduce my stress. I can make a commitment to go to the gym more and do yoga more. My job is stressful, and my family depends on me to operate at a high level. Still, there are things that I can do to try to reduce stress. I need to sleep better. I love coffee, but I’ve lowered my intake to sleep better. I’m not a big drinker, but I like an occasional “adult beverage” with my friends. It affects my sleep. I need to be aware. I love to BBQ with KD (my 14-year-old son,) but smoke affects my breathing and sleep. I’m not sure I can change this. The whole father-son time is too precious to give up.
Simply, I’ve got to practice self-care. I need to do a better job of it. My family depends on me to be around. I need to be around for them.
And I’m nudging you to practice your own self-care. You know what you need to do to take care of yourself.
Until next time…